My Baby Boys!

WOW!  I haven't posted since August 1 of last year?!! I didn't realize it had been that long but I had great reasons -- the Internet is a scary, scary place for a pregnant woman so I basically lived off the grid for pretty much the majority of my pregnancy... but I'm happy to share that I gave birth a few weeks ago (at 37 weeks!!) to two of the most beautiful boys I have ever seen in my life.  God has given me more than I ever thought I would have in this life and my gratitude to Him is eternal.

I'm going to keep their names & birthday secret for now :-)

This was the BEST decision I ever made.

Hearts A Flutter

Corny title but I can't help it! Great day! Saw the heartbeats!!

I was worried yesterday because I was having spasms/twitching mostly in my lower abdomen so was glad that I had to go in for an ultrasound today. The tech checked my tubes to make sure that the third embryo wasn't growing somewhere in my tubes. I had no idea that the embryos would travel like that, thought that with IVF/egg transfers the possibility of ectopic pregnancies was totally eliminated. But the nurse said that it's likely that my interior's moving things around to make room for the babies. Good, because I didn't know what to think!

But I saw both sacs again & they look fantastic! Just gorgeous. One is measuring 5w6d & the other at 6w0d. But it was the fluttering of their hearts that made me emotional. The tech had to point it out to me because the activity was small on the screen & was happening so quickly. I can't remember which had what heartbeat rate but one measured at 115 bpm & the other at 117 bpm. Right within the normal range, thank God! I was smiling sooooooooo hard. I'll be able to hear them in a couple of weeks. Beta was 47,000 (it was 21,293 on Monday) so I'm right on track, praise Him! I go back to the RE on Monday.

These twice-weekly visits are helpful to my peace of mind. All these co-pays are going to put me over the top for 2012 deductions! And I go back for acupuncture on Saturday, counting those receipts too!

Told my mother & could tell how happy & relieved she was to hear how they're doing.  It made me very happy to tell her. It makes me feel awesome that, through God, I'm giving her something to be joyful about.

I hardly have any appetite but still have to eat. Great news is that now that I am not craving sugar I am actually eating better. (Is this what it's like not being a slave to sweets?!) Have added lentils for protein (thanks for the tip, Beans!). Still tired & took a nap this afternoon but have just come down from a burst of energy. House looks a shameful mess so I took a little time to clean up. Am continuing with the PIO shots.

Very proud that I'm drinking lots of water given the fact I never drank enough. And this is ice tea season! Sharp, tingling sensation that alternates breasts a few times a day. Abdomen feels heavier today, & I've been bloated for weeks.

I don't know why I haven't told my friends that I have twins on board. I've only told my mother. I'm already a pretty secretive person & it was plenty to tell 3 of my friends about my BFP. I told the third friend yesterday -- she gave me a ride home from ET weeks ago (I needed a ride & had no choice but to ask her) &  I haven't spoken to her since that day. She was worried so left me a message, & when I called her back I told her. I've been debating whether I'll tell my other 2 friends, but for now I'm comfortable waiting until the second trimester, God willing.

I did tell them that I used a Caucasian donor, though... I'm Black, by the way, & I thought that by tossing in that detail while I was TTC was worth mentioning! They didn't bat an eye & I didn't expect them to. The bank I used had, like, one Black donor & he wanted to remain anonymous so that was definitely not an option. I chose a donor with dark characteristics. Plan was that my offspring would look in the mirror & see more of me & not live life til 18 wondering where their blue-green-hazel eyes came from, for example. The sperm bank also was having a sale specifically on IVF sperm, actually... if anyone told me that I would be in the middle of this kind of conversation I would've said more than, "Whatchu talkin' 'bout, Willis?"

Rambling now, I'm beat! I didn't sleep at all last night & I attribute that to the long nap I took earlier that day + the anxiety over the spasms & twitches. I'd go to bed but don't want to risk missing my nightly PIO shot time like I almost did a couple nights ago.

Turned off the damn AC (I cannot stand artificial coldness or coldness of any kind but I have pets, can't let them suffer & bake)! It's about 80 with low humidity & a nice lakefront breeze. Windows & front door are open, it's a beautiful night. In Chicago :-)

A Few Observations

Had another ultrasound today & fetal poles were detected! I go back on Thursday, & in about another week or so I'll be able to hear the heartbeats :-)

Still tired & I fluctuate between eating everything in sight to not having much of an appetite. Could likely be the progesterone doing this to me since it's pretty high. And my face looks like a pizza! Zits everywhere & to others I've blamed it on the heat but I know better... PIO strikes again! Oh well, small price to pay so no problem. I'm working super hard to get in more protein too (per RE's nurse & my acupuncturist). I'm a sugar addict & nothing with lots of protein is sweet. Except for yogurt, could never get past the rotten-milk smell so that's out. Been eating almonds like crazy, too.

Speaking of smells, my sense of smell goes bionic at times. It was especially noticeable today when a coworker was eating something with ranch dressing. I personally don't like creamy dressings that have color because my mind believes it has to be nasty... thousand island is crunchy & horrible, ranch smells sour & has too much damn tang. But when I got a whiff of that ranch today I had to cover my nose, it was rank! Matter of fact, lunchtime was hell in the office because there were too many different smells coming from everywhere. Another coworker was heating up some kind of chicken & the smell was overwhelming & gross. I couldn't take it & got the heck out.

Tried to eat Kashi cereal with some almond milk (cut back on cow's milk a while ago) so I could get some protein with fiber. It was like trying to chew sticks & rocks. Going back to Raisin Bran, it's been a while but I can get some additional folic acid + it actually tastes good. Trying so hard to eat better for the fetuses!

Still working on staying hydrated, especially in this heat. And it is hot! I love it!

(God bless Rodney King.)

Yes!

Two sacs!  Two sacs were seen today on my ultrasound!  Only one was seen on the first ultrasound this week but given that it was still early there was a possibility that another may appear, & I'm so (cautiously) happy about that. In my heart I hoped that I'd have twins! (I'm also about 5 weeks along.)

Beta #3 was a nice 6,112 & I go back on Monday for another ultrasound & blood draw. My RE says she'd like me to come in twice a week until the twelfth week when (God willing) I'm released to an OB. I'm also doing acupuncture twice a week for the same timeframe. The regularity of those visits will adjust the further I'm along.

Aside from fatigue & a bout of killer gas two days ago I feel mostly the same. My apetite's shifted a bit, though. I don't really have a desire to eat until nighttime. It's not like I'm turned off by anything, I'm just not very hungry in the morning to the afternoon.

Psychologically, I still think I'm in a bit of shock. I don't think everything's fully dawned on me so I'm not feeling too panicked between visits. But now that I know there are two in me my prayer is that they both grow & develop normally, that they both stick around for each other!

I do have to learn to be happy about the possibilities of this pregnancy, to not allow fear to cloud my joy. I should be able to enjoy every minute of this good news. It's still so early yet so my prayer is that as time & their development progress, I'll be able to be comfortable with all these wonderful changes. Trusting God with all of this!

But enough about me! I'm praying for MN who had her FET yesterday! Ooh, I'm praying for a 2WW that just flies by that also results in a happy lil BFP :-)