Friday, July 27, 2012

Exhale

Normal scan, thank God! And I finally heard their heartbeats for the first time, absolutely incredible. Let out a laugh that came from my soul. And they were bouncing around in their little sacs. Too amazing. Also found out that there are 2 placentas for each sac.

Beans, it didn't cross my mind that it'd be more of a challenge to see them! It helped greatly that they were in good positions and the tech was able to take measurements more easily. Gotta wait 1-2 weeks for blood test results.

Thought I turned a corner with the fatigue, but no! And I have had a nonstop headache for going on 2 days! I'm so tired but it's not easy to sleep with my head carrying on. I know I can take Tylenol but I don't wanna take any drugs minus the PIO.

Yawn with a nice stretch. Off to bed, hopefully :-)

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Next Up: NT Scan

Ooh, it's nice to have a moment where my eyes don't feel like weights. I'm feeling rather awake today & think I've turned a corner (as I thought a few days ago before taking a 3-hour nap at 11 o'clock in the morning). Went for an ultrasound yesterday & both babies have almost caught up to each other -- 11 weeks & 11w2d with strong heartbeats, praise Jesus!

I go in for a nuchal translucency (NT) scan on Friday. It's incredible all the early milestones we have to 'pass' with IVF:
- Day 3 for FSH/AMH blood test
- Day 1 of cycle
- Begin Estrace or some other pill
- Pre-ultrasound before stimming
- Pay for stim drugs
- Ultrasounds every other day or so
- May have to adjust stims
- Exact timing of HCG shot or else
- Clearance for egg retrieval
- Hope for eggs at egg retrieval
- Wait to hear if they fertilized with fertilization report
- Go back for embryo transfer
- Wait 2 extra-long weeks for results
- Go back weekly for ultrasounds when you get the BFP
- Continue with labs to see if PIO needs adjusting + if HCG is doubling
- Sacs & fetal poles to see
- Heart rates, crown-to-rump sizing by gestation
- Clear the 6 week hurdle (didn't know about that until week 7 & thank God)
- Find an OB
- Hope you find a good OB
- NT scan... where I am now, going on Friday
- Wait for NT scan results, 1-2 weeks
- Wait to get the hell out of the first trimester
- Coast through the second & third trimester
- Healthy babies!

Now I know I floated through the last 2 bullets; still studying up on gestational diabetes & preeclampsia & other terrific milestones to clear. Just move from worry about becoming pregnant to worry about the pregnancy... girl, just wait til the babies come! I am a bit anxious about Friday's scan, though, but I'm visualizing it going well, just having faith in that. Praying daily (& through every moment of anxiety) & trusting God has kept me truly sane & just a bit happy.

I'll be released from my RE after the scan! I have been so blessed to work with this office & these people, have been a bit spoiled with the close monitoring & weekly ultrasounds. My first appointment with my new OB is next Tuesday. Hope she's good. Was looking for OBs out of a certain Chicago practice & I found her online. Of her specialties she has experience with twin gestation & advanced maternal age... that's me!

Got my sense of taste back! I'm only dealing with gross aftertastes but popping an Altoid has worked wonders. I've been eating more & drinking milk, not to mention that I've gone through 2 cartons of Oreo ice cream in 2 days. Aside from that I'm only craving fruits & healthier fare, still can't stand the sight of nuts & sweets like cake or candy. Been sneezing a lot more, heartburn comes and goes. Still keeping up my nightly ritual of PIO shots.

I'm off work for a bit & have the nerve to want to catch up on sleep. I had a list of all these things I'd like to accomplish, but my body's telling me to rest. I just watched the movie 'Margaret' yesterday with Anna Paquin -- she can act her Kiwi *ss off! I'd be surprised if she isn't nominated for an Oscar.

Gonna walk my beasts around the block & then watch 'Fast Five' for the third time -- fantastic chase scenes + seeing The Rock's thick-sweaty-pretty-smiling-sexy *ss will make for a nice triple encore.

**Update**
I've been experiencing hot flashes off & on for the better part of an hour! This isn't the first time; I dismissed the other times because of how hot it's been. I feel the heat & sweat for a few minutes, then it passes. Went online & read that it may be due to hormone fluctuations. Interesting!

(I'm praying for you, MN.)

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Gummy Bears

Didn't realize it's been so long since I've posted! Spending most of my days nodding off in the middle of sentences or taking naps... time just flies by :-) And my old puppies are still here, thanks for all your tips & concern! Maybe he knew what I was considering so he found a little bit of gusto to prove there's life in him yet! My poochie poos are the best, my heros.

I'll be 10 weeks on Tuesday (here, here) & finally made an appointment with an OB. Made the mistake, though, of scheduling it the week before I'm released from my RE so I'm going to have to reschedule for the first week in August. Still continuing with the PIO shots.

But I do go back to the RE on Monday for my weekly ultrasound. They're looking like gummy bears & their heartbeats continue to be strong. It's amazing how hard they're working to grow & I pray each day that they continue to do so. I'm still in the first trimester & am just asking them to keep up the great work!

The house looks a train wreck so I thought I'd take some time vacuuming, picking up dog hair, throwing out trash... now I'm experiencing spasms in my lower right abdomen, painless signs that I gotta slow down. My waistline is thickening, belly's a bit more noticeable & my *ss is HUGE. In other words, I'm a biggun. The acne has slowed down but I think that's more to do with the acne face wash & astringent.

Food has the nastiest aftertaste. I can't find anything that tastes good. Sandwiches are gross, iced tea tastes like swill. Everything tastes to the left. I had the worst metallic taste in my mouth a few days ago, didn't even want to eat for the rest of the day. My acupuncturist reassured me that hydration is more important in the first trimester so even if I can't find consistency in my appetite (I go from no appetite at all to total starvation) I should just work on staying hydrated.

I am not complaining! Gotta chronicle these changes that I had no idea pregnant women experience. But still no morning sickness, just occasional queasiness & food aversions (I miss my almonds! Wanna puke just looking at the word!). My tailbone was giving me hell to last week & finally my back feels normal.

I have a friend who confided in me that she wants to pursue being an SMBC, best news all week! I gave her my RE's & my acupuncturist's names, shared my supplement tips, & just told her that I'll support her any way I can. She's a few years younger than me & feels ready to give this a try. I'm so happy she's starting now; a few years ago when I was her age I was still holding out for a significant other & his sperm. See how that turned out!

Think I'll keep sitting here in this soft, comfortable chair & finish Die Hard with a Vengeance. I didn't realize how much I miss real chase scenes with not a seat belt in sight & bona fide explosions of subways & entire city blocks... have a great weekend, friends!

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Best Friends

The Fourth of July is one of my favorite days of the year, but this year it's unexpectedly been the hardest. I bawled this morning over the realization that one of my dearest dogs isn't getting any better. He's 13 years old, has arthritis and plenty of lameness, has congestive heart failure, and now he's vomiting at least once a day. Strange as this sounds, I've been hoping that he would just pass away in his sleep because the thought of having to take him in to be euthanized is unfathomable. When he threw up again this morning the reality of his decline hit me so hard. No matter what I do, no supplements or orthopedic foam is changing the fact that there's nothing I can do to make him better.

My family took in two dogs of the same litter 13 years ago & my life hasn't been the same since. I raised these dogs, I love these dogs. They truly are my best friends. I wonder how the other dog will be alone without his brother. I already had it in mind that neither dog would make it to the fall (the cold would be absolute hell on their joints) but with one so much sicker than the other I didn't think that his time would come so soon. I told my parents this morning (they live out of state), and they were so very sad, kept saying, "The poor thing." When they moved they did a swift job of it, and because they left like thieves in the night the least sickly dog has separation anxiety -- he doesn't let me out of his sight at all, sweet crazy dog! My parents still feel guilty about it and now that one of the dogs might have to be euthanized they wish they could see him one last time.

And wouldn't you know that as infirm as he is as soon as I motioned that it was time for a walk that sick old dog popped up like a puppy and was prancing circles around me! Lame, in pain, none of that matters when he wants to get to the out of doors. Contradicting moments like that, that's what makes this so hard. Given that it's 100 degrees outside I thought I would just take them to the corner and back (he can't stand a tip toe outside just to come back in five minutes later). So we went the whole way around the hot *ss block because if these are his last days I want him to have it all. When we came in he plopped his happy self in front of the central air vent and is knocked out. I was thinking that Monday would be the day but I'm going to pray on it. I don't want him suffering, I also don't want to put him down before the twinkle in his eyes go out. Lord, I don't know what to do.

I've been giving him dog aspirin at night for his joints and I feel that's contributing to his stomach upset. I'm gonna cut that out and just keep them both on their morning prescription arthritis medicine (Previcox, best drug ever) + other joint supplements.

On happier news I am 8 weeks and a day! Twins are progressing beautifully and now I've been given the directive to find an OB. I haven't posted in so long because this fatigue is something else! Once I visit a few blogs I hardly have energy enough to write. Now I set an alarm to wake me at night to take my PIO shot! No appetite, nothing appeals to me at all. No morning sickness either aside from a few queasy moments here and there.

It would be a such a happy miracle if my puppies were around in 7 more months. God willing, I would love for my babies to meet them. But God also knows that I'm glad for each day with these best friends of mine.